No Need For An Iron Supplement.

Like most people I know what ADHD stands for, but when they added-CT to the diagnosis I was at a loss. (Remember I received our diagnostic letter in the mail, eh.) So what is actually stands for is combined type.

Did you know there was more than one type of ADHD?

Well I didn't and so I'm breaking it down in my attempts to understand my Tigerlily.

Type 1. Inattentive

These are the daydreamers.
They forget to listen, don't pay enough attention.
They have trouble following or understanding directions.
Misplace or lose necessary items.
Avoid difficult tasks.
Make careless mistakes
etc etc.

Type 2. Hyperactive Impulsive

These are the non stop, gogogo peeps.
They fidget and squirm.
Are in constant motion, get up all the time even when sitting is expected.
They are too loud, talk to much, and interrupt.
They run and climb and jump across the couch randomly.
Playing quietly takes a lot of effort.
Controlling impulses is really really hard.


Type 3. The Combined Type

The unpredictable type.
Sometimes we are type 1, sometimes we are type 2.
It's a mystery to all
Just what we are going to do!




After a lot of reading this is what it boils down to in relation to Tigerlily; there is no telling how she will behave or what she will do. Except her ASD requires routine. I can't imagine how conflicted the Tiger must be within her own mind. I seriously hope that someday she will be able to explain how she deals to me, because given her dual diagnosis she must have an iron will to have come so far.

Ok I need a coffee now as frankly I just find all the contradictions tiring.

The High Functioning Life, what will we do next?

HFL Mama

A Male Mind

 

 

Hardcore research mode has led me to an interesting idea. Now once again people this is just for entertainment purposes and I'm not any kind of authority on anything so don't take my word for it.

 

So I'm hunting for information on ASD and ADHD-CT in girls and not having much luck on getting any kind of stats and I'm scrolling through my google finds when this EMB theory comes up and it mentions PCOS as a potential cause for autism/ ADHD?

 

Hold up, I have PCOS, (poly cystic ovarian syndrome), but I thought the mysterious "they" had determined that autism genetic code was passed down from the father? I thought I was off the hook for this.  Well anyways EMB turned out to stand for extreme male brain caused by an overabundance of testosterone in the womb?

Ok my hormone levels are whacky that could've happened.

 

Yup so we all know male and female brains are different, Mars vs Venus etc. What I took from what I was reading is that Simon Baron-Cohen theorizes that male brains are better at systemizing, finding patterns, mathematics etc while female brains are better at empathizing recognizing social and emotional changes, cues and causes. Most brains can do both men leaning more to the S systemizing type and women lean more to the female E empathizing type etc. but when you get to the extreme S type you lose the E type skills and that this explains autism and ADHD diagnoses being attached to boys over girls statistically speaking.

 

 ( disclaimer again do your own research, I was reading this http://personal.lse.ac.uk/kanazawa/pdfs/JTB2005a.pdf )

 

Anyways this got me to thinking about double standards of behavior for boys and girls and how much my Tigerlily stands alone as having both predominately male disorders. & I remembered that when Tiger was starting school etc how I told her educators to think of her as a little boy. To try to school their responses and reprimands by always thinking if a little boy did this, would I say anything?

 

I'm very annoyed by gender stereotyping, I want equality for my daughter in all things and I do my best to ensure that she understands that men and women are equal. So this new diagnosis has brought this up again for me and with the Womens' March and the United State Of Women campaign and all the conversations Tiger and I have been having about equality between the sexes, equal rights etc.

 I just thought the concept of her having an extreme male brain in a female body was interesting. I wonder if this extreme male brain would affect her sexuality? Will she go into a predominately male field of work as an adult etc.

 

Again just interesting to me and thought I'd share it.

 

The High Functioning Life , another day means another theory.

 

 

HFL Mama

Hardcore Mode

I live in Canada so like it or not weather has an  impact on my life. On January 4th 2017, the weather caused lots of road closures, it was basically a blizzard so we missed our specialist appointment. I did actually try to go,  but chickened out when I reached the highway and couldn't see the intersection lights.

So calls were made and eventually our specialist called us back. She was having a rough day being the only person who made it into her office. Anyways there are laws about disclosing medical information and she was unable to give the results of our latest evaluation on the phone, or schedule another appointment within the next 5 months (sigh*), so the decision was made to mail our results to us.

Three weeks later I'm holding a medical report that states not only does my Tiger have ASD, she's also ADHD-CT. ( CT stands for combined type and I'll write a post on my interpretation of that confusion later.)
 Awesome meme!

In all honesty this wasn't a surprise to me. In fact after my initial pity party where I allow myself to whine, b*tch and moan about the unfairness of it all. I'll admit that it doesn't really impact anything in a bad way. As Daddybear says" she's still our Tigerlily, she hasn't changed".

So we've doubled up on our diagnoses and we have more information to work with and another report  to slide across the table when some unfortunate administrator starts waiving red tape in my direction. What I need to do now, is further educate myself on ADHD-CT, dual diagnosis, next steps etc.
So far the recommendations  are eerily similar to what came with her ASD with the exception of medication being suggested.

M...m....mmm...medication?!?! That is just ...... Ok I'm about to launch into a whole debate lets also leave that for another post but I will say Daddybear has strong opinions on this.

So far now that's all I've got to say, I'm going to switch over to hardcore research mode and read a whole lot more on the subjects that have been raised by this new diagnosis.

The High Functioning Life, Hardcore is an accurate description some days.

HFL Mama

High Functioning Holiday Hell

Don't you just love the holidays?

 I do,  I love snow, eggnog and all the baking! I usually go through about 10 pounds of butter during December. I'm a stress baker, need I say more?

The fact of the matter is, that when I envisioned having children, I dreamed of Happy Christmas Mornings, cute school concerts and caroling around the neighbourhood. I dreamed of Holiday vacations to visit relatives far away, skiing, sledding and skating all day. Drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows and lots of happy noise.

Right now the above are not happening, and that's OK.
Tiger only went to school one day the week leading up to winter break and that's cool too.

The thing about holidays is that they are a break in our routine. I love that break, anticipating, planning, decorating, BAKING. I love the holidays,
It's fun for me,

I don't have autism.

My daughter is completely torn in two over the holidays. This is high functioning hell. She understands the holiday is coming, she anticipates the extra fun stuff we are going to be doing. She loves to decorate and lick the beaters, but as the holidays get closer routines get disrupted and then she can't cope.

Our amazing friends and family come to visit us, because Tiger and long car rides don't mix and we still have problems. 

She's fine they say, don't worry about it, it's ok.
It's ok for them and its ok for me, we can adjust and cope with her behaviours.

What about Tigerlily?

What hell it must be for a child to long for something that comes with so many challenges?

I watch her trying to decide if it will be worth the amount of effort she's going to have to put in & it breaks my heart that she usually decides against trying and it hurts more knowing that I agree with her decision. I'm willing to go, heck I offer up the activities and outings in the first place knowing that its going to be a struggle. I still want to try... as long as she wants to, because
when things go right, her joy is a sight to behold.

The High Functioning Life, sometimes its hell getting to Joyeux Noel.

My Patronus Is A Beaver

Guess what I've been watching!
If you can't just go now cuz I'm not explaining my HP references today.

Anyways for my fellow HP fans I was up very late last night and somewhere around  4 am I decided that I absolutely love the idea of having a spirit animal, Patronus.

I then started assigning different animals to different people and they weren't as obvious as you might suppose.

For example I think Daddybear would actually have an Orca as his spirit animal.
I think Tigerlily would have a skunk and I think a beaver would be fitting for me.

OK obviously I've had no sleep and this is a weird post but I just thought I'd put it out there.

I think I have the spirit of a beaver. I'm very industrious, I like to be productive in a tangible way. I tend to alter the environment around me to suit my families needs etc. Anyways a quick google found this and I want one.

https://www.google.ca/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwi21d6fvoDRAhUG2oMKHZZnAxEQjhwIBQ&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.redbubble.com%2Fpeople%2Fjerosmith0819%2Fworks%2F12633447-my-patronus-is-a-beaver%3Fp%3Dthrow-pillow&psig=AFQjCNFe47tIHoZ0DOm7HlcZGoh9SxwP4g&ust=1482244752932659

Maybe I should sleep while Tiger is in school, I'm devoting too much thought to this idea.
& I'm not sure I should really use a rodent as a reflection of myself , but it is very Canadian of me eh!



The High Functioning Life, where 4am's bright ideas sound a little silly after I've had a coffee.

HFL Mama

Weighing Success

I love it when a plan comes together.

Now we've switched to a new school, we have an IEP, we have an EA and now we are getting OT and possibly PT at school as well. We are still doing ABA both funded and private and we are making progress again. It amazes me how strong my little girl is. Switching schools can be traumatic for any kid, but Tiger has coped far better than I dared to dream.

I'll be honest I didn't expect this to go so well. Sure her sleep was messed up for a few weeks before and after the switch, but she did sleep. Sure we had some meltdowns, but not as many or as severe as I had feared. Now who do I credit with this smooth transition?

Why me of course.  Just kidding... no not really kidding. I'm an awesome mama eh. I'm a badass when it comes to my kid .  I put a lot of hard work into this transition. There were dozen of  calls and meetings going on, actually they are still happening but you want to know how I know I've done a good job?

Tiger is gaining weight.

She is on track to break 40 lbs this year, & that is just huge folks.

Any of you out there with feeding issues will understand why writing that sentence, brings on the goose impression.

Honk sniff*

Ok so it's not all me, I have to say this new board, principal, teacher, EA , bus driver and aide have all done there absolute best to make this transition as easy for Tiger as possible.  They've also spent hours on calls and meetings and visits, assessments etc. I was very hesitant to trust the public system again after how badly our first foray went, but this is going OK. and I'm even considering starting a new adventure of my own, just weighing my options right now.

So I'm in happy mode today and wanted to share, have a great day, I'm going to go bake a non stress cake.


The High Functioning Life, where we can physically weigh our success! 39.6 pounds worth to be exact.

HFL Mama


Update: at the end of January 2017 we are now officially 40.6 lbs!
Do a little dance, bake another batch, get on the scale woo!

It's Not You, It's Me.

It's not you..... it's me. I've changed.

After years on the ASD train, I am completely immersed in a different type of life, and it has changed me.

I think I'm a better person.
I'm more patient... because I have to be.
I'm more open and honest about difficulties and challenges ..... because I have to be.
I've shed the majority of my materialism, envy and false pride because, priorities, people.

For the most part I don't care about what other people think of me anymore. Don't like my bagged out, no makeup, yoga pants wearing style ... bite me, cuz I spend my cash on my kids ABA eh. My hair is  always in a messy bun. That ombre style, yeah I'm rocking it, cuz I can't keep the colour up.  I'm not so vain anymore.

I'm wiser,
I've learned a ton of stuff about special education, autism, early child development, therapies etc.
I'm more forgiving. I can let sh*t go, because really who cares, who said what,
 when I'm negotiating a new IEP, following up with CCAC, CRA and PEER Evaluations.

 I work with a whole team of people and keep up communications between different agencies to ensure that everyone is working on the same page.

I am organized, I have contact lists, records and files ready at my fingertips should they be needed.
The bag I take to meetings weighs a ton, but I never have to get back to you with information.
Just a minute I have it right here!

I'm a machete to red tape.
I can negotiate.
I'm pushy and persistent, yes I will follow up with you, don't doubt it.
No I won't reschedule, I'm sorry (cuz I'm Canadian) but you'll need to push something else on your calendar, I've already made arrangements to be there.

I am an autism mom and I'm a badass.The board sent a rep to cover their asses at every meeting for the new school, I like the new school, they don't dick around.

So if you find me aggressive, if my candor makes you uncomfortable don't worry..

It's not you, it's me and I like me.

Who do you like?


The High Functioning Life, where we don't get to be typical, we get to be warriors!

HFL Mama.